Ocean’s Twelve (2004)

Catherine Zeta-Jones in Ocean's Twelve
Catherine Zeta-Jones in Ocean’s Twelve

The worst one of the trilogy. If there is a reason to watch it until the end, the reason is the beautiful Catherine Zeta-Jones. Other than that, the story is not interesting, the way it is presented is not the best, and some issues are not very clear. The third followed the approach of the first, making it a success. So, if I had to suggest anyone to watch Ocean’s trilogy, I would, doubtful, suggest to skip this one. Yeah, just 4 in 10 at IMDB.

Ocean’s Eleven (2001)

Bellagio Casino
Bellagio Casino

Seen Ocean’s Thirteen a lot of time ago. And a lot of time to see this one, and the Twelve too. And I am sorry I took to much. The movie is just great. The same kind of way to tell the story as the Thirteen, but anyway, entertaining, fun, with action. Great cast, although I am not a fan of Brad Pitt. Anyway, great. 8 in 10 @ IMDB.

The Expendables 3 (2014)

Two Mummies: Arnold Schwarzenegger and Harrison Ford
Two Mummies: Arnold Schwarzenegger and Harrison Ford

Not much to say about the movie. Half the cast are mummies, and I am not sure how they can still move. The new expendables (see the movie for the definition of new) aren’t bad ass as other expendables on previous movies. Jason Statham is mostly hidden. Mel Gibson as some class. Harrison Ford has some nice shots, too. Other than that, see the movie for the usual explosions, shots and fights. Other than that, a couple of humorous quotes. Ah… and Antonio Banderas is just crazy on this movie. At some point it gets really boring to listen to. And yeah, I know it is deliberate. Voted 6 in 10.

To finish, a small quote I liked:

Barney Ross: Better get out of that seat and move to the back, Christmas is coming.
Galgo: But it’s only June…

Lucy (2014)

Scarlett Johansson as Lucy
Scarlett Johansson as Lucy

In case you need a motivation to watch this movie, probably the picture above is enough. And I will not comment more on that in this post… well, that will be difficult…

Now, on the movie, the plot is interesting enough. Flaws? Probably lots of them. I did not really though on that while watching. If you know you are watching a Sci-Fi movie, let it go, and trust it. Do not try to rationalize. Of course, some inconsistencies can make a movie worst. But although some can exist on Lucy, I do not think they ruin anyhow the movie.

Also, the “National Geographic”-like interrupts are, somehow, interesting, although annoying on specific parts. Nevertheless, an 8/10@IMDB. Scalett’s fault too, right.

Teen Spirit (2011)

Lindsey Shaw as Lisa Summers
Lindsey Shaw as Lisa Summers

Not much to say about the story, as it is an old, old story, you watched over and over again in different movies. Also, not much to say on the plot quality (as in, is the story at least coherent?). So, what made me watch it till the end?

First, is has some good jokes. Yeah, not that many. But a few that are enough to entertain you. Second, because of the girls, and mostly important, Lindsey Shaw that is very, very cute, and Katie Sarife, also cute. Cassie Scerbo is not ugly or anything, but appears as the standard barbie-style, that is now mostly annoying.

And although it might seems weird, voting 6/10, more than Madagascar 3 madness.

Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted (2012)

Madagascar's Penguins
Madagascar’s Penguins

Every time a new Ice Age comes out, here comes Madagascar as well. Instead of a rodent, for some cool jokes, Madagascar has four penguins. Instead of a bobcat, they have a lion. Instead of a mammoth, a hippopotamus. Instead of a sloth, a zebra. Just the giraffe hasn’t a counterpart in Ice Age. While Ice Age tries to keep things mostly real (or plausible), Madagascar’s focus is on non-sense. If you ask which make you laugh the most, I would say, none. You can give a laugh from time to time, mostly because of the penguins than anything else, but its all. And that musical sequence is just disturbing.

[5/10@imdb]

Ted (2012)

Ted
Ted

The guy (Ted) is cute and fluffy. Mila Kunis is hot. Laura Vandervoort appears a few times, and she is also hot. Other than that, the movie is… bah… watchable. Some nice jokes, but some other are just forced, making no sense whatsoever. Ah, and Patrick Stewart is A BOSS as narrator.

[6/10@IMDB]

Gravity (2013)

Sandra Bullock @ Gravity
Sandra Bullock @ Gravity

Curiously, and unlike other reviews, I’ll start saying I head very bad about this movie. I didn’t even know it won any Oscar. Just noticed it after watching it, and looking into IMDB about its classification.

Yes, story is crap. Scenarios are mostly crap (everywhere CGI, too much CGI). But something must be given credit: to pay two actors, have no real scenarios, I expect it to be mostly cheap. But probably not, as I am not sure how cheap are CGI nowadays.

Other than that, Sandra Bullock is still hot. Of course she is getting old, but still has it. In the other hand, Clooney seems to be always equal to himself. But in this movie he seems more like a clown than an astronaut. Really. That dream scene is just pathetic. He seems to be smiling always. And that smile didn’t relate to what he was saying. Probably he was having fun during the recordings, or just smiling on how imbecile was that scene.

If you ask me what I liked on this movie, it was the sound. Just great. Great to sense the silence of space. Great to sense the noisy silence of water.

Voted 7 in 10 @IMDB.

Defendor (2009)

Defendor
Defendor

A suggestion by a friend. I confess I was not expecting this. And if you did not watch this movie, you should stop here and find it somewhere. After reading the rest of the post the movie will not have all the feeling it should.

More than an action movie or a comedy (it is both of them), this is a drama. So, do not expect the usual superhero approach. Also, do not expect it to be a standard Hollywood movie. You know, at the end the main character will be dead. So, no, not that usual in Hollywood. And in fact, it isn’t, as it seems to be produced in Canada.

I will not tell the story, so probably the rest of the post will not make any sense if you did not watch it. But anyway… the main message is that any of us can stand to make a difference. Unfortunately, not all can do it like the main characters, and that is good, or a lot of us would be dead already. But in any case, each of us is a super hero, even if you do not wear a cape (also, capes are for flying).

Other than that, loved the puns with “DefenDOG” and “DefenDOOR”. I am just sad they did not keep it up to the limit. It would have been fun.

The Concubine (2012)

The Concubine
The Concubine

The movie is not bad. I feel bad because I can’t understand Korean (I hope it is in Korean) and I feel like the English subtitles are not up to the movie quality. Also, and please, do not misinterpret me, but I can’t really distinguish much Asian faces. Not sure why, but maybe because my brain is trained to distinguish occidental faces, and it somehow feels like Asian faces are much alike. So, I did have some trouble in the beginning to distinguish the characters and, during that time, I might got confused with the Plot.

Nevertheless, I read some comments on this movie and they just got to the same conclusion I had, so probably I was able to understand the relevant parts of the plot.

The movie has a nice atmosphere, with a scent of eroticism from time to time. But, just like someone commented at IMDB, no, this is not an erotic movie.

Beware, spoilers ahead.

The plot is mostly from a Drama that could be easily titled “The Game of the Throne”. With the dead of the king (couldn’t understand how natural it was), and without any legitimate hair, his mother and his wife fight for the throne. And they are up to anything for that. Up to killing!